When we think we failed (Exodus 2-3)

Exodus 2:11-3:10

Key verse 3:10

What kind of person do you think God uses? Strangely, God always uses losers or those who fail and suffer, not those who are able and successful from human eyes. Moses was not an exception. Though he was able, that was not the reason God used him. In today’s passage, Moses tried to rescue the Israelites but he failed. Then, he had to flee to Midian a foreign country to save his life. He became a loser. But many years later when Moses became nobody, God called him out of Midian back to Egypt. God raised one man Moses through his failure and suffering and used him for the salvation of the Israelites. I pray that we may see our failures and sufferings from God’s perspective and can be used for his purposes in his time.

Moses fled from Egypt to Midian

               

¹¹ One day, after Moses had grown up, he went out to where his own people were and watched them at their hard labor. He saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, one of his own people. 

It was when Moses was about 40 years old. (Acts 7:23) One day he went out and watched the Hebrews at their hard labor. Moses had compassion on the slaves. Then he saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew. The Hebrew fell to the ground and moaned. The Egyptians kept beating him, shouting at him to get back to work. Moses could no longer watch such an injustice. Seeing that no one else was around, he killed the Egyptian and then hid the body in the sand.

Killing an Egyptian could jeopardize his life even though he was a son of Pharaoh’s daughter. Why did he kill the Egyptian then? In verse 11, we can see that Moses regarded the Hebrews as his own people, which was mentioned twice. Though Moses became a son of Pharaoh’s daughter, he knew that he belonged to the Hebrews. So Moses had compassion on them and thought about how to rescue his people. Acts 7:25 reads that Moses thought God was using him to rescue his own people. Moses was in a quite different situation than other Hebrews. He was a son of Pharaoh’s daughter. He was well educated. He had power. He was in a position to do something for his people. By killing the Egyptian, he thought he did a right thing for his own people.

The next day he went out and saw two Hebrews fighting. Since both were Hebrew, Moses tried to stop them fighting. He said to the one in the wrong,  “Why are you hitting your fellow Hebrew?” But the man’s response shocked Moses.

¹⁴ The man said, “Who made you ruler and judge over us? Are you thinking of killing me as you killed the Egyptian?” Then Moses was afraid and thought, “What I did must have become known.”

The man retorted, “What? Who are you? Why are you prying into our matter? This is not your business. You are not our judge. Get out of here!” Moses tried to reconcile them out of genuine concern for his own people, but he was coldly rejected. This hurt him so much and greatly discouraged him. And Moses realized that his murder of the Egyptian was known. Suddenly, Moses was afraid. Soon, he found out that Pharaoh heard of his killing of an Egyptian and tried to kill him. Probably, Moses’ action was regarded as treason to Pharaoh. Far from saving his people, Moses had to save himself first. Immediately, he had to leave Egypt and fled to live in Midian, which was part of the west of Modern Saudi Arabia. He ran and ran to get far away from Pharaoh to save his life.

Finally, he arrived at a well in Midian. He sat down there and took a break. Moses still could not figure out why his own people rejected him. Anyway, he could not go back to Egypt. Overnight, he became a refuge having no place to go. He could not believe his reality. Yesterday he was a prince in Egypt but now he was a stranger in a foreign country. He was so confused and did not know what to do the next. While sitting down by the well, some people came to the well.

 ¹⁶ Now a priest of Midian had seven daughters, and they came to draw water and fill the troughs to water their father’s flock.¹⁷ Some shepherds came along and drove them away, but Moses got up and came to their rescue and watered their flock.

Moses happened to see an injustice there. Out of his sense of justice and compassion, Moses fought against the shepherds and subdued them. I guess that he was well built and knew how to fight. After rescuing the shepherdesses, he watered their flock. He was courageous and also kind and compassionate to the helpless. When the girls returned home, their father wondered why they came home earlier than usual. So they told him what happened. “You know, we were troubled by a gang of shepherds. And an Egyptians came and smashed them. He even kindly watered all our flock. We have never seen such a courageous and handsome man!”

Hearing this, their father Reuel invited Moses to have something to eat. Meeting with Moses, he came to like Moses. He was strong, educated and handsome. So, he offered Moses to stay in his house.

²¹ Moses agreed to stay with the man, who gave his daughter Zipporah to Moses in marriage. ²² Zipporah gave birth to a son, and Moses named him Gershom, saying, “I have become a foreigner in a foreign land.”

In this way, Moses came to live in Median. He married and got a son. Interestingly, he named his son Gershom, meaning “a stranger there.” The name reflected Moses’ reality. When I came to USA about 20 years ago, the totally different environment overwhelmed me. I could not speak English. I had no car, no job and no medical insurance. When I got sick, I endured pain until I got well. I did not like American food. And I was so lonely. I came to understand what it meant to be a foreigner in a foreign land. It was so stressful that I lost about 20 pounds in six months. Moses must have suffered more than I did. What really bothered him though, was that he became a foreigner because his own people rejected him, which remained as a trauma until many years later. Now he was far away from his own people and his Egyptian household. Overnight, he lost everything he had in Egypt. Though he was able and educated, there were not much things for him to do in Midian other than shepherding with his new family. While living in the foreign land, his passion, his knowledge, and even his relationship with his people faded away. He used to be the one who could have saved his people, but now he became a loser and a foreigner.

Meanwhile, the Israelites continued to suffer in their slavery. We wonder, “Where was God? What was he doing? Why did he not care for his people? Is this the end of the one he drew out of the water?”

²³ During that long period, the king of Egypt died. The Israelites groaned in their slavery and cried out, and their cry for help because of their slavery went up to God. ²⁴ God heard their groaning and he remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac and with Jacob.²⁵ So God looked on the Israelites and was concerned about them.

Many years had passed since Moses left Egypt. During that time, the king of Egypt, who tried to kill Moses, died. The Israelites groaned in their slavery and cried. “Lord, save us! Why do you let us suffer? Why are you silent?” But God was not silent.

God heard their groaning. He was not ignorant of their affliction. He saw their misery and knew their sufferings. (3:7) He had compassion on them. And he remembered his covenant with their fathers. God said to Abraham that his offspring would suffer in a foreign country and then he would bring them out of there and lead them to the land he had promised. (Gen 15:13,14,16) Now the Israelites suffered enough and the time God had set came to fulfill his promise given to their forefathers. Now he was about to take an action to rescue them. What did he do then?

God called Moses out of Midian back to Egypt

¹ Now Moses was tending the flock of Jethro his father-in-law, the priest of Midian, and he led the flock to the far side of the wilderness and came to Horeb, the mountain of God. 

Now Moses was about 80 years old. (Acts 7:7) Already, forty years passed since then. It was a long period. We don’t know what happened to Moses during such a long time. But he still lived in the house of his father-in-law and tended the flock for him. Not much had changed for the 40 years. Everyday was the same. But he got old and became a mediocre man. Then, one day when he led the flock far to the wilderness and then saw a very strange thing.

² There the angel of the Lord appeared to him in flames of fire from within a bush. Moses saw that though the bush was on fire it did not burn up. ³ So Moses thought, “I will go over and see this strange sight—why the bush does not burn up.”

The bush was in flames of fire but did not burn up. He had never seen such a strange thing. The sight was odd enough to arouse his curiosity. Somehow, he felt that the burning bush rekindled something in him that had been almost dead like an ember in the ash. So, he went over to see the strange sight. As he came close to the bush, he heard someone calling his name, “Moses! Moses!” The calling was from within the burning bush. Soon, he came to realize that God was calling him from the burning bush. He answered, “Here I am.”

⁵ “Do not come any closer,” God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” 

God stopped Moses coming closer and told him to take off his sandals. The place where Moses was standing was holy because God was there. Sandals were regarded unclean. Moses could not stand on the holy ground with unholy things.

It was very intriguing and important that God let Moses know God’s holiness at his first encounter with him. Later when God met with the Israelites for the first time at the same place, he also taught them his holiness. (19:9-25) God is holy. That is the most important thing we should know about God. Unless we know his holiness, we cannot say that you know God. Unless we know his holiness, our relationship with God is not true. Do you know why? It is because only with God’s holiness we can see our sins and thus repent. In other words, knowing God’s holiness means that we are sinners before God and He will surely judge us for our sins. So God’s holiness leads us to fear him and thus to repentant of our sins.

Isaiah lived in a time of turmoil. (Isa 6) Isaiah was so saddened and frustrated with what was going on in Israel. He complained about his people. Then one day when he entered the temple, he saw the glory of God sitting on a throne. Seraphim covered this faces and feet with their winds and called to one another, “Holy, holy, holy, is the LORD Almighty.” At this Isaiah cried, “Woe to me! … For I am a man of unclean lips and I live among a people of unclean lips.” When he saw God’s holiness, he could see his own sin first not others’ sins. When Peter saw Jesus’ divine power and his holiness, he said, “Go away from me, Lord; I am a sinful man!” (Luke 5:8) As such, knowing God’s holiness is the beginning of our relation with God and our salvation.

This generation is filled with all kinds of sins and evil. But the root problem is that we are losing God’s holiness in us and in our church. Holiness has become as optional at best even to Christians. There is not much of forgiveness and conviction particularly among young people because they lack or do not know God’s holiness. Recently, I read an article titled “How we forgot the holiness of God” written by Drew Dyck posted in ChristianToday.com. The article reads,

“We picture God only as a God who provides mercy, not judgment….As the next generation of young Christians…continues to root themselves well within culture, we’ve lost the marks that allow Christ to be seen by a world that denies Him. We’ve lost holiness…A vision of God's holiness rescues our worship from superficiality and makes it passionate and profound.”

God is a consuming fire. (Heb 12:28) No can stand before the Holy God. God is holy so we cannot but fear him. This is one of the most important themes in the Bible. The cross of Jesus must be also understood in light of God’s holiness. Then we can see God’s mercy as well.

Hearing about God’s word, Moses hid his face because he was afraid of the Holy God. (6) He began to see his sin before the Holy God. He thought that he was righteous enough to rescue his people. He was angry about the injustice of Egyptians and their sins. But before the Holy God, he was also a sinner. God taught him that he was not righteous. He failed not because he was unlucky or the people rejected him but because he was self-righteousness and sinful as others.

As such, the relationship with God begins with knowing God’s holiness. We should meet the Holy God and then we will realize we need God’s mercy and we can have a true relationship with God. There is no other way to experience God’s grace and forgiveness without knowing his holiness. God cannot use us until we truly see God’s holiness and thus our sins. This was the same with Moses. Before he was used, he needed to know God’s holiness and his sins must be forgiven.

⁶ Then he said, “I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob.” 

God associated himself with the Israelites who were in slavery and with Moses as well by saying, “I am the God of your father.” Now Moses was seeing the living God. God then told Moses how much he was concerned about his people and what he was going to do.

⁷ The Lord said, “I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. ⁸ So I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey—the home of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. 

God had already known the affliction of the Israelites in slavery. He saw their misery and heard their cry enough. So, he was going to come to rescue them from Egyptians and lead them into the very land he had promised to give to Abraham.

¹⁰ So now, go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt.”

Now God commanded Moses to go back to Egypt. He would use Moses to rescue his people. In the past, Moses tried to save his own people by his will. In a sense, he sent himself to save his people but completely failed. But this time God was sending him back to Egypt according to his will and plan and in his time.

Who is God who called Moses and sent him?

God is faithful to his covenant and thus to his people. Though about 400 years passed, he still remembered his promise to Abraham. And when the right time came, he began to work to lead his people out of Egypt into the land of promise. For that purpose, he raised one man Moses. When the Israelites were in suffering, he sent a baby to a Levi family. God saved the baby miraculously from the Nile and Pharaoh. He let him grow in his mother and then under the protection of Pharaoh’s daughter. When he grew up, he wanted to save his own people. But God let him fail and become a lonely foreigner. After 40 years in Midian, he did not have anything to be proud of. Until he came to see God’s holiness and know his own sin, God patiently waited for him and molded him through his failure and suffering. Now through his failure and suffering, he became humble enough to carry our God’s plan. As such, God’s desire for us is not simply to use us. His ultimate goal for us is to mold us into his people who are humble. And he uses our suffering and failures to make us humble and see his holiness and his mercy.

After 10, 20, 30 or 40 years, we may not see any fruit. Yet, our failure and suffering are necessary for us to be purified and humbled to carry out God’s will for us. When we suffer and fail, we lose confidence in ourselves and then realize how sinful we are, which is actual good in God’s sight. We want to do something when we are young and capable. We are easily driven by our own passion and ability. But God’s way can be different than ours. His time is different from ours. He waits until we become nobody. Suffering is painful but God uses it to humble us so that we can obey him absolutely and depend on him entirely. We may think we are too late to do something. But remember that Moses was called when he was 80 years old and became the greatest leader in history.

M Moses and Sarah used to say that they were losers. After many years of their mission life in US they had no visible fruit. M Moses struggled with a couple of difficult Bible students for a long time but eventually they all left. M Moses maintained a low-paying job until he retired. Professionally, he was not successful, either. He underwent so many troubles, sufferings, and discouragement. Yet, that was God’s time for him. God sent him to Belize after his retirement. God has used his humbleness, which was formed through his failures and sufferings and blessed his ministry abundantly. Now he needs a bigger Bible center. In God, we cannot say that it is too late. In God, we must not say that we are losers. When we think we are too late, that is the time for God to use us. When we think that we failed, that is the time for God to reveal his power and glory.

To be used by God is not a matter of our ability or our choice. To God, how much we are able or how much we have accomplished is not important. What is important is whether we are humble enough to obey him or not. God does not use a person who is driven by his own passion, ability, and vision. He calls and uses the one who is driven by God’s power, God’s compassion, and God’s will. We can be easily disappointed with our failure and suffering. Yet, God uses them to see our sins and God’s holiness so that we can be changed into men and women of God. So, do not lose heart in your suffering and failure. Rather, wait and God will use you for sure in his time according to his purposes and plan for you. Our present suffering is an evidence that God is with us and he has plans for us. Let’s praise God who raises each of us with patience and for his purposes. May God use all of us according to his will. Amen!

By David Yun