My Chosen instrument [Act 9]

My Chosen instrument

Act 9:1-31[ref. 22:3-21; 25:9-18]
Key Verse 9:15¹⁵ But the Lord said to Ananias, "Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel.

It is good to review the history of the church so far.

·        Introduction: After the third testimony before the Sanhedrin, being filled with the Holy Spirit, Stephen ended his message with a charge that they were stiff necked people and like their ancestors, they rebelled against God and even killed the Coming Messiah Jesus. At hearing this, all picked up stones and threw them at him to cause his death. This sparked a new beginning of persecution over the entire believers. Saul, a young man, led the persecution. He rounded up many disciples of Jesus and put them in prison. In this way, he poured out cold water over the ministry of the Holy Spirit. At the high point of Saul’s persecution, risen Jesus appeared to him and changed him totally. He became the most zealous disciple of Jesus.

Who was Saul? Why did Jesus appear to him and save him?  It was all too strange and difficult to understand for the believers. Even now for us, it was an event that we have a hard time to understand or to capture God’s will in this.

A.      Saul’s murderous threat [1-2]

Who was Saul?
Acts 22:3 "I am a Jew, born in Tarsus of Cilicia, but brought up in this city. I studied under Gamaliel and was thoroughly trained in the law of our ancestors. I was just as zealous for God as any of you are today.

Saul was born in Tarsus, a city of Roman Colony, far away from the land of Israel. But he studied the entire book of the OT under the most knowledgeable teacher of the time, Gamaliel. This means that he knew the law of Moses, God’s promise, and God’s promise for the coming Messiah.  He firmly believed in God.

Saul was among those who stoned Stephen to death. He heard the message of Stephen. He heard when Stephen said, ‘Look the Son of man is standing at the right hand of God’. He also saw Stephen being stoned to death, shedding all of his blood and his entire body was torn apart. His mind was totally shut to the word of God. He rejected Jesus as the Son of God, the Messiah. Rather his spirit was high in his own understanding. In his mind, he was right and just in persecuting the followers of Jesus. So in his zeal, he took the helm of this systematic operation to arrest all those that follow Jesus. He got a full permit from the high priest to arrest all, women and men indiscriminately. Also, he wanted to go as far as Damascus, about 150 miles from Jerusalem. It is quite reasonable to think that he already arrested many in and around Jerusalem or its vicinities.  So he was heading to Damascus. What might have been his catch word? ‘Get rid of all rebellion!’ It was far beyond the borders of Israel. Saul had a great zeal to protect and preserve the Jewish religious establishment not only in Jerusalem and Judea, but also many other diasporas in a distant country. He himself described in this way: ⁴ I persecuted the followers of this Way to their death, arresting both men and women and throwing them into prison[22:3]

What was he doing? Though he knew the word of God, he used the word of God for his nationalistic zeal, his zeal for the traditions of the ancestors. He would do anything to uphold the righteousness of his religious establishment; at the heart of this was self-righteousness. He was so right and good in his own eyes, he was determined to eradicate the followers of Jesus, who were tampering on his belief, the belief of the entire Pharisees and teachers of the law, the entire religious system of the Jews. He expressed himself in this way:

¹⁴ I was advancing in Judaism beyond many of my own age among my people and was extremely zealous for the traditions of my fathers [Gal 1].

All traditions are built around nationalistic self-righteousness. Though Israel had the full words of God, in the course of time, they changed it into a system to uphold nationalistic self-righteousness. Though Saul learned the words of God, he could not get out of it. He failed to see Jesus as the Son of God. It was because he was so right and good in his own eyes. How dangerous was it? Human goodness is built around a family, a tribe, or a nation. When one or people adhere to this human goodness, self-righteousness is established. In such a premise established in self-righteousness, all others that oppose this established goodness of the family or of the nation, must be condemned and purged away from that family or society or nation. This is especially believed to be backed by God, the creator of heaven and earth.

What is the essence of the problem? They failed to accept that they were as much a sinner before God as any other and further they failed to honor God and accept God’s righteousness.  It was replaced by human goodness and that was upheld as if the righteousness had been bestowed by God.  At the heart of all these is ‘self-righteousness in the law.’ Even if it was based on God’s word, it was built in human goodness. This will reject God’s goodness and God’s righteousness.  This was the root of Adam’s sin. This was expressed at the plane of Shinar, where men said, let’s make our own name!  It leads one to the blindness towards God’s grace. This is expressed in all forms of ‘righteousness formulated by men or their system’. All religious establishments by human beings fall into this.  Saul was breathing murderous threats to God’s people.  This was the typical form of righteousness that brings persecution onto others. In human goodness, murder was justified and upheld.  Even we can dare to say that this is the source of all human conflicts, person to person, family against family, nation against nation! When all nations of the world are under one form of human goodness, what would happen? It will surely oppose God! In this regard, what Saul was doing was the worst sin of men. What did Jesus do with such man?

B.      Saul’s encounter with Jesus [3-9]

V3-4 Suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. It was about noon time when the Sun was high above, but the light was brighter than the Sun. It was blazing around Saul and his companions [26:13]. The light was so bright and intense that they were encircled by blazing fire. It seemed like he was arrested by this intense and bright light from heaven. He could not move forward or backward and he could not escape from this bright light.

In this ‘arrested situation,’ he heard a voice saying ‘Saul, Saul why do you persecute me?’  He did not know who it was and asked, ‘Who are you Lord?’.

V5

Jesus appeared to him and charged him, asking why Saul was persecuting Jesus. In this way Jesus arrested him by his bright light and demanded an answer as to why Saul was persecuting him. Actually, his whole being was in his hand. His whole being was seen and exposed to the Lord Jesus. In authority and power, Jesus was demanding an answer. What could he answer? He was dumbfounded. Jesus continued.

V6.

He was told to go to the city and he would be told what he must do. What Jesus was going to do with him is all but certain. Since he was demanding an answer for why Saul persecuted Jesus, and he would be told what he must do, it was quite obvious that there will surely be some form of punishment.

During this time what happened to the other companions? His companion heard a sound and did not see anyone. So it was clear, that the appearance of Jesus was solely for Saul. As he was about to get up and go to the city, what did he find out?

V8-9

He could not see anything; his vision was totally black! He became totally incapacitated and totally became dependent on others. What is this? What is Jesus trying to do with me? He prayed the next whole day. Nothing happened. No one came to him and no one offered to help him. The second day he was still; he could not see anything and kept praying.

What might have gone through his mind? Surely it was a form of punishment for what he did to Jesus. Like this for three days, he was in darkness and could not do anything but think and pray! Pray to whom? His life was in a crisis. He could be forever like this, living as a blind man. It all depended on the mercy of the Lord Jesus.

On the third day, he saw in a vision; a man Ananias. He came and laid his hands on Saul in prayer. This vision opened a glimpse of hope for Saul while praying in darkness by blindness.  

C.      My chosen instrument [10-16]

While Saul was in darkness, God made a visit to Ananias in a vision and said this

V11-12. God wanted him to go to Saul and pray for him so that he may be restored in his sight. But Ananias was very reluctant to do so.

V13-14 Because of what Saul did was so flagrantly hostile to God’s people, it was not right for him to pray for such a person. He even killed Stephen; he was a murderer. So in Ananias’ mind, Saul cannot be accepted and even shall not be accepted by anyone as one of a godly family.  But what was Jesus thinking? Jesus wanted him to help out Saul?

V15-16. 

But Jesus had a clear purpose for appearing to Saul and blinding him.

Jesus told him to go. ‘Go’ is a very strong word of command. Jesus understood Ananias’ reasoning and his feeling. Jesus agreed with Ananias assessment of Saul fully. Despite his history of violent and ungodly acts, Jesus has chosen him. Why? Jesus is strongly telling him that Ananias must know and accept Jesus’ will and purpose, though it might not agree with his own feelings or way of thinking.

What was God’s will for Saul?

·         Jesus has chosen Saul as his instrument. If we are not chosen by God, we become an instrument of evil or satanic forces. Saul was not far from it. But Jesus chose him as his instrument.  The purpose of this instrument, Saul, was specific - to proclaim Jesus’ name to the Gentiles and their kings, and to the people of Israel. What does it mean? For Jesus, sending the message to the Gentiles and their kings and the people of Israel was so important. He would accomplish this by using such a man as Saul.

·         This does not mean that Saul was going to have a free pass for so much of God’s blessing. He had to pay his dues! As much he caused havoc to Jesus, he would suffer for Jesus’ name sake. But it would not be.

When Ananias heard Jesus’ argument, he accepted and went to see Saul.

D.     Restoration of Saul [17-20]

As Jesus directed, Ananias went to meet Saul and told him this:

V17

Until now, he remained in blindness. He could not see anything. In this way, he was totally incapable of anything. He became a useless man. Further, he gave himself to prayer. In prayer he was fully reminded of what he saw and what he heard of Jesus.  I like to delve into what might have gone through the mind of Saul during this, the darkest time of his life.

He heard the Message of Stephen.

Acts 7:51 "You stiff-necked people! Your hearts and ears are still uncircumcised. You are just like your ancestors: You always resist the Holy Spirit! ⁵² Was there ever a prophet your ancestors did not persecute? They even killed those who predicted the coming of the Righteous One. And now you have betrayed and murdered him-- ⁵³ you who have received the law that was given through angels but have not obeyed it."

He heard what Stephen said just before his death. “Look I see heaven open and the Son of man standing at the right hand of God.’

He heard, Saul, Saul why do you persecute me? It was not purely a word of condemnation or judgment. It was not just words of anger and bitterness; rather it was words of pain and sorrow, and pleading in love.

Through these things, what did he come to know about himself?

Extremely zealous for the traditions of my fathers [Gal 1:14] He put many Lord’s people to prison. He tried to force them to blaspheme; he was obsessed with persecuting them.

Simply, he himself was a blasphemer and murderer. Practically, he joined in killing of the Son of God and all of his followers. Can he survive? Can he forgiven? Is he worthy of God’s mercy? Jesus put him into this darkness. He thought he knew so well and was so sure of what he was doing. But actually, he was blind and did not see anything of God and his truth. He failed to see the Son of God, who is so glorious, so powerful and so loving!

Blindness is judgment in nature. Now in this darkness, he was totally helpless, powerless, and useless! This blindness is the true reality of the life he had lived. What could he do? It was Jesus who inflicted such blindness and it was Jesus only that could open his eyes again. It is possible only by Jesus grace and mercy. Who else can do anything for him? As Ananias feared him and did not consider him worthy of his blessing, no one could count him for anything good in a godly perspective.

He came to realized that he was the worst sinner [1 Tim 1:15]! He was more ungodly than sorcerers, adulterers, murderers, idolaters whom he detested so much.  Who was worse than the one that chased after all godly men and women willfully and murdered them even though he knew God and his law so well? He was willfully sinful and went against God to uphold his own honor and righteousness. Such a man is worthy of eternal punishment! He must be put in the fires of hell. He was the worst sinner before God and His Son, Jesus. Though nothing was recorded of what went through his mind at this time, through his letters, we can conjecture that these things went through his mind. The theme of his being the worst sinner is repeated many of his letters.  He was not just saying this in order to put emphasis on his sin for the purpose of glorifying God. He was literally the worst sinner.

We are all sinners. But among us, there are liars, cheaters, adulterers, and murderers. Even among liars, the one who lied only once and the one whose life is filled with lies are different. Like this, Saul was the worst sinner before God. Among these all, Saul was the one least likely to receive God’s mercy and grace.

But Jesus sent his servant Ananias. As he laid his hand on and prayed for Saul, his eyes were opened and he could see again. Darkness was gone and light shined in his eyes as well as in his mind and spirit. It was like going through death and resurrection.  In this way, Jesus showed mercy on him and saved him from God’s judgment. He restored him fully to be one of his own.  So Saul’s call and his salvation were totally by God’s grace. I mean 100%.  Saul did nothing to save himself. There was nothing to merit such blessing. This is how Jesus forged his new life from its beginning. The essential character or particularity is God’s grace. His existence, his meaning of life, or the purpose of his life cannot be thought of apart from this grace of God.

Why did Jesus do that?

1.      In his life, the message of salvation may be clearer in Saul’s life than anyone else’s life. His life itself is the message of God’s grace. This is also the heart of the message that Jesus gave through Jesus’ suffering and death on the cross for our sins. It is said that while we were still sinners, Jesus died for us. The grace of God that he revealed in Christ is most prominently revealed in the life of Saul. The message is crystal clear! Saul was saved by Jesus’ grace! Nothing else!

2.      Jesus chose him as his particular instrument; He may preach the good news to the gentiles, kings and the people of Israel. We can take this simply as God’s purpose for his life. But I would like to delve into it more.
What is so particular about Saul? We would ask, why not Peter or John or Andrew… Why not find someone else for this mission instead of the one with murderous threats?
Each instrument has been made with a particular configuration so as to do a particular job. If I want to cut a piece of wood into two, I might be able to do with a hammer but I cannot do it as I could with a saw. Simply, it is not possible to cut it with a clear edge with a hammer. If I try to do so, it may just break the wood and make it useless.
What is the particular character or configuration or functionality that Saul had that is different from all others? As with an instrument, it is in the way how it is created or made from the very beginning of its existence. What is it so unique and different in the life of Saul that Saul is far more fitting to proclaim Jesus’ name to the Gentiles, their kings and to the people of Israel? It is Jesus’ grace in his life. From the outset of his being as a child of God or God’s servant, Saul’s life was totally configured by the grace of Jesus. So grace is the root and source power of the job that Jesus assigned him to do. Are we different? No! It is only evident in Saul’s life. But we all are saved totally by the grace of Jesus. As much Saul’s new life was forged by Jesus’ grace, so we all are. This should be the source of our strength to follow him.

3.      Jesus made clear what kind of people he was willing to save.  The Gentiles do not have any spiritual background. Their entire lives are set against God, just like Saul’s. If Jesus saved Saul, he would surely be willing to save the Gentiles too no matter how they lived against God. To them, Saul could be the perfect messenger to their king; kings are important for God’s mission. But to go against kings is not easy. They hold almost absolute power and authority over men. To go shoulder to shoulder with such power, God needed a man of such zeal and power in words, and power in language, and power in zeal. Saul, the worst sinner was saved by Jesus’ grace. If so, then who else cannot be saved by Jesus grace? If Jesus embraces such a man as Saul then, Jesus would embrace all sinners! No one has sinned a greater sin than Saul. Who openly and willfully opposed God and his people? He is the one who upheld high his pride and authority over God.
Each of us is chosen by Jesus for his will. Now as we look at ourselves, we look too small and too insignificant and too powerless. But in 10 years, God will use each of you with greater good and purpose than you may realize.

4.      To the people of Israel- Though many came to Christ through the message of the Apostles, still large masses of Pharisees were holding out their post against God’s message of salvation. To penetrate and to break the core belief of Israel, Jesus needed a man who had in depth knowledge of the Law and Prophets. Saul was the best one fit for this purpose.
Out of these three, though his first priority was on the Jew, his main goal was the Gentiles. As we indicated, this was fully realized as the people of Jerusalem rejected his message and tried to kill him. At this time, Jesus told him to go to the gentiles because the people of Israel would not listen to Saul.

5.      Lastly, we cannot ignore the fact that Saul was Hellenistic Jew, born in Tarsus. This means that he not only knows Aramaic and Hebraic but also spoke fluently Greek.  Peter and many other apostles might have not known Greek so well and could not communicate effectively the message of salvation to those whose primary language was Greek. Actually, the entire Roman world spoke Greek. Jesus envisioned preaching the good news to the entire Roman world.
God called Bob and Tom to the faith in Jesus. Jesus’ call to them was not as dramatic as Saul’s, but they are also chosen instruments of Jesus with a specific purpose. There are so many Chinese speaking people that do not yet know the Gospel of Jesus. I realized that B and T are not only very smart in human knowledge but also the spirit of God is with them and they understand the words of God so well. I can see why God called them as his instruments for his work; I believe that they are the leaders that will lead the mission for many Chinese students in the world.  

By Grace Saul was saved. So Saul owes Jesus big time. How can Saul make up for such grace that he received? In this regard, Jesus said this to Saul,  

¹⁶ I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.’  He caused so much suffering for Jesus. But now in Jesus’ grace he will suffer much for his name sake. So Saul said this; ¹⁰ But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them--yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.  (1Co 15:10)

E.      Saul’s preaching in Damascus and Jerusalem  [20-31]

a.      In Damascus

After his eyes were opened and he was baptized, what happened?

¹⁹ and after taking some food, he regained his strength. Saul spent several days with the disciples in Damascus.

He fully recovered his strength, physically and spiritually. When I said he was fully recovered, I mean that he was fully convinced of the newly found truth—Jesus is the Lord Savior that the entire Bible prophesied. Also, the baptism of the Holy Spirit upon him is the sign of Jesus’ full acceptance of him as one of his own, right and just being worthy to be God’s.  In a matter of few days before, he was as good as dead in blindness. But by God’s grace he was fully recovered physically as well as spiritually.  What did he do?

At once, Saul preached in the synagogues that Jesus is the Son of God. Many were shocked to hear from him such a message. But he was undeterred by their opposition and amazement. He preached the good news of Jesus day after day. The zeal to destroy godly people was redirected to proclaim the Good News of Jesus. According to Gal 1, Saul was there or Arabia [Syria] for three years before going to Jerusalem. Most likely, Damascus was his base camp for his missionary work over Arabia [Syria]. Eventually, the Jews did not listen to Saul and conspired to kill him. So he ran away. It was an ultimate response and sign of rejection of the truth of the Gospel. This tells us that Saul preached the Gospel with such inviolable reason and force that they could not overcome except resorting to such force.

b.      In Jerusalem

About three or more years was passed by since he met Risen Christ. As he ran away from Damascus, he came to Jerusalem.  But no apostles gave any trust to him because they knew him as the persecutor of Jesus’ disciples. But after introduction of Barnabas, they accepted him as one of their own. Saul moved about freely among them and again he was engaged in talk with the Hellenistic Jews.

‘speaking boldly in the name of the Lord. ²⁹ He talked and debated with the Hellenistic Jews,¹ but they tried to kill him.’

His main message was that Jesus is the Lord. Saul preached to them fullest extent. This means that both in Damascus, and in Jerusalem, Saul faced death threats. It is sad that they rejected the truth of life.  But at the same time, this tells us that Saul was so powerful and so zealous in pushing them to their limit of tolerance. It is the proof of God’s grace living in his life. In the richness of Jesus’ grace, he dared to give out everything, even to the risk of his life. Through these two historical records, it became obvious that Saul has changed after meeting Risen Jesus. He became a powerful evangelist for the Jews.

We all are saved by God’s grace in Jesus. If it were not for his grace, none of us would be or could be saved and know and enjoy the richness of God’s blessing. Then do we know fully the grace of Jesus? Are we as much responding to that grace?